The IIM Candidate

I think life is an alternating series of important, potentially life-changing days and carefree, insignifcant days. There are days when all you do is eat, spend and laugh heartily, sometimes even forgetting what day of the week it is, and then there are days which by their mere approach inspire an adrenaline rush; days you would have been thinking about for months, sometimes years in advance; days when eating, laughing and merry-making is absolutely the last thing on your mind. These are the days when you know you have to be serious, simply because a bit of seriousness would change the way you live. Drastically.

Sunday. March 13th

The day of my IIM-A interview.

As I mentioned (bragged rather) in one of my earlier posts, I took the CAT (its an exam - Common Aptitude Test) - and God's pet creation that I am, somehow managed to clear it. Consequently, I got calls from the top four Management Institutes, IIM-A, IIM-B, IIM-C and IIM-L inviting me to attend the next round of selection process, which comprised of a Group Discussion (GD) and a Personal Interview (PI).

Let me give you guys an idea of what they'd ask you in the interview - I dont know.
But its a general opinion that they normally question the candidate about their work experience, academic courses, current affairs in politics and business.

A week before the interview (March 6th), my Dad called me up to ask how the preparation was going on.

'Are you reading up the newspapers and keeping yourself updated about all the current affairs ?'

'Yes, Dad.'

'You know all about these recent assembly elections right ?'

'Yeah, Dad. Dont worry about it. I know all that.'

'Do you know which government fell in Goa very recently ?'

Guessing time.

Well, maybe I can make an intelligent guess. You see, I believe that anything can be deduced by starting with what you know and then logically and systematically eliminating alternatives.

Hmm. So what do I know.
India is a democracy.
It has a multi-party system. (Wow. Aint I omniscient ?)
Now, maybe I can eliminate the possibilty of the smaller parties forming a goverment, and focus on just the big parties with a national presence. After all, isnt there a 90 % chance of a national party capturing the state assembly as well ?
Okay, now that I'm past that irrefutable logic, what are the parties with a national presence in India ?
Congress. BJP.
Isnt this unbelievable ? I started with the statement 'India is a multi-party democracy' and I am about 1 inch close to finding out which government fell in Goa recently !! Hail Oka ! The God of logic !

'Do you know or not ?' my Dad interrupts the smooth functioning of the well-oiled machinery that my brain is.

'Yeah Dad, I know. It is...'

BJP or Congress.

'It is...'

Congress or BJP.

Inky Pinky Ponky.
Father has a donkey.
Father dies. Donkey cries.
Inky Pinky Ponky. Ponky !!

'Umm.. Congress.'

There was a second's pause on the other end.
I could visualise relief and pride replacing my Dad's anxiety, as he came to terms with the fact that his son is well prepared for his interview, after all.

'Enna da ?' ('What is this?' in Tamil)

'You dont know even the stuff which make headlines ? It was the BJP government which went through a vote of confidence and was brought down.'

So much for my guessing prowess.
I must have missed something in that Inky Pinky rhyme.

Great start to the day. Now my parents must be anxious as well as disappointed.
I started pacing the apartment wihtout speaking a word. Thats what I do when I am in deep thought. I walked to every nook and crook of the apartment. I am not sure if anything came out of all that pacing, but it sure did prompt Manish to comment that if I do this on a regular basis, we can pay the housemaid less and ask her not to sweep the floor.

Finally, I decided to have a look at the form. IIM-A had sent me a form to be filled up. Besides the regular questions about my academic performance, degree, name, sex etc, they had also asked a series of questions apparently testing my motivation and aptness for the MBA course.

There was a question about my extra curricular activities and the prizes and awards that I have received. I thought I will tackle that first as it sounded pretty simple. I made myself comfortable on the bed and started thinking about it.

15 minutes later. No idea.
Maybe the question is not that simple after all.

30 minutes later.
I always knew I had a short memory.

1 hour later.
Maybe I should look at my certificates. I'll definitely find something there.
Umm... where are my certificates?

2 hours later.
I find my 10th and 12th marksheet in the folder with "all" my certificates. The other pages are all empty. What the hell was I doing all my life ???
No. I must have done something. Let me rack my brains a little longer.

3 hours.
Snore....Snore....

4 hours later, I woke up, and found my certificates flying around in the room. For a second I panicked. Then realisation dawned on me and I thanked God that I wasnt home in Chennai, and there's no Timmy here (Timmy is my pet dog - he lives with my parents back in Chennai).

Timmy, when he was very young and going through the chewing phase (its a phase in a dog's life where he has this irresistable urge to chew on anything and everything), had had my Chemistry Record for breakfast once.
The important thing was, it was the day when I had to submit it to my Chemistry instructor.

I had no option but to take the half-chewed record to my teacher. The lady, kind that she was, gave a benevolent look at my panic-striken face, took me to the cafeteria and got me a plate of biscuits.

As you can see, that left a pretty deep impression on me. (Not that I didnt gobble down those biscuits.)

Anyway, I gathered all my certificates, put them back in the folder and dumped it in my cupboard somewhere in between all the crumpled clothes. I took up the form again, and with renewed energy obtained from all those hours of sleep, decided to attack the questions again.
I decided to leave the extracurricular question for later.
Another question looked promising.

'What are your strengths and weaknesses with respect to a career in management ?'

Let me start with my strengths.

15 minutes. No idea.

Oh God !! Not again !!!!

I am gonna learn from my mistake, and not waste time over something which anyway is not gonna occur to me.

Over to weaknesses.
Now what are my weaknesses ?

Lazy.
Perverted.
Annoying.
Irritating.
Pathetic.
Habitually indecisive.
Logically impulsive.
Socially repulsive.
High frustration levels.
Low tolerance levels.
Zero confidence levels.
...
... (I dont count on readers to have so much patience)
...
Jackass.
Smart-ass.

51 records found. Search time: 0.0041 seconds.

I put the form back into its cover, and switched on the TV.

(To be continued.)